I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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