now i know why i became what i already was.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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