I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize