so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
