I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
