everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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