so explain again why im purple
no
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize