Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Two words: nipple clamps
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