im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
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I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
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What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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