her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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