I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Randomize
