Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize