I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
