could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
A+ Viking dick
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
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