I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
