drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize