i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Randomize