How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
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