i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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