i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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