"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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