do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
