Barsexuality is the new black.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude