How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
