Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
