I just saw a hot homeless man
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
