Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
