Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize