Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
