I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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