living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
