Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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