Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize