i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
