I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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