Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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