don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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