chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
