The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize