This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
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The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
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He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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