Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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