did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
