i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
