don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical