i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
