ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Randomize
