Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize