That's intense
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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