: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
