Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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