You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
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Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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