we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Church boner. Awkwardddd
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
