I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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